Trip to Phnom Penh for Pchum Ben!

I say, those seats are "capitol" old chap!

Cambodia just celebrated "Pchum Ben", a holiday to honor and praise ancestors. One Cambodian lady told Emily that the holiday is really just a chance for everyone to feed the monks (to make up for letting them starve the rest of the year). Apparently dry humour floats around Cambodia too! :)

Since the three days we get off of work fall right after the weekend, it seemed like a good opportunity to go visit Phnom Penh, and get a chance to explore the capital city. Unfortunately, the closer we got to last-weekend, more we heard about flooding everywhere! There's been lots of flooding around the country, and warnings issued for Phnom Penh as well, but my dad was there, and he seemed alive, so we went for it. I'm glad we did too! This blog post'll cover the journey down, and Em's first interactions with the ins-and-outs of Cambodian transit, and the next post'll cover some of the finer points of chillin'-like-a-villain in da 'Penh.

We didn't stage this, it was just that cheesy-delish

We set our alarms for 6:00 A.M. on Saturday morning. We got up at about 7:00 A.M. on Saturday morning. Carefully anticipating this eventuality, Em and I (read Emily) packed our stuff the night before. We decided we'd pick up breakfast somewhere on the way, and spent out time checking, and double-checking to make sure we had everything we needed before heading off. We were offered many tuk-tuk rides on the way, but were convinced we didn't need one, and that we'd make it just fine, thanks. It's not that we had heavy or excessive baggage per se, just that the bags were awkward, and we didn't feel the pressures of time keenly. This combo of factors found us ordering our breakfast to go at the Sunrise Cafe on the way to the Capitol bus stop. We ordered a "Battambang Omelette", which was delicious (made more delicious on the bus by our lack of cutlery, and excess of cheese). We also got coffee to go in plastics cups. Normally this is ok, but we ordered hot coffees. I have a greater appreciation for styrofoam's ability to protect hands from heat.

Isn't this a wicked photo? I like it.

I don't have a picture of it, but the hustle to get your bags on the bus is a great scene to see. Battambang has lots of limes and oranges at this time of year, and it seemed like some people were using Captiol Tours as their official logistics solutions for their small-time export businesses. Everyone's pushing to get their bags on the bus first, which is ridiculous, because then they get their bags back last when they get off. Still, they seem to do it with a kind of fear that if they don't then they might not get their bags on. This kind of frenzy grips you, and makes you begin to question if there's some kind of local logic to it - like maybe you actually won't get your bag on the bus! As it turns out, this isn't true, it's the same-old same-old: everyone wants to be first. I just kind of wait at the side until one of the workers loading the bus looks over, show him my ticket, hand him my bag, say the number, point to the tape and his marker, speak a few words in khmer, make firm eye-contact, look at my bag, look at my ticket, look at him, and then smile. It's worked twice so far. I like it more than yelling at the dudes.

Sticky-riz avec sweet iced-coffee

When em and I finish eating, we realize that we haven't said our prayers yet, so we thought about it, looked around, and realizing that we're in a small private room provided by the language barrier - went ahead and said our morning prayers. Em discovered that Battabang is larger than the five square blocks that encompass our lives, as the bus wound its way through the city on our way out. The countryside is generally flat in this area, so our view on the way is pretty constant: rice fields and tiny fish farms. In fact, it is pretty, and constant. And the fish farms are both tiny, and they farm tiny fish. What an odd accumulation of sentence. We were bright enough to bring our own water with us, so we could stay hydrated, and enjoy the ride. We were stupid enough to drink a lot of the water we brought after drinking our coffees, not being sure of when the bus would stop for bathroom breaks, etc. We were saved from exploding bladders at around 11:30 or so, when we pulled into a little bus stop. It has a small canteen, some washrooms in the back (with entrepreneurial beggar-boys suggesting that you have to pay them for the privilege....lemma: as a follow-up to the mendicancy post I had no cash when I went to the washroom, but I don't think I would have given them money in this case either. since they were kids of the people that lived there, and seemed to be doing just fine without cash, and it didn't seem like you actually had to pay anyway).  It also has a few small shops with ladies selling fresh fruits, chips, nuts, and BAMBOO STICKY-RICE! It's not really all that good, but it's a fun experience to eat bean-filled sticky rice out of a piece of bamboo.

We discovered the secrets of using these
all-too-small cup-holders.

We're trying, as Baha'is to expand the learning mode of "consultation, action, and reflection" to as many new fields of thought and action as possible. Unfortunately, we failed to expand it to "bus rides in Cambodia" as we blatantly repeet our mistake of coffee+water+no control of stop time. Undeterred, Emily used a small stop when the bus driver only meant to drop one person off (like unplanned stop) to go find a bathroom. she stopped and talked to the bus driver on her way out, and then left, so I assumed that it was all good. Then the bus driver gets back on the bus, and Em's still not back. He looks at me imploringly, I look at him, shrug my shoulders, and hold my hands up - it's the international sign of "hey, whatchya gonna do about it, eh?" I would have given him the "hands-tied" tied sign, but I'm not sure if that's an offensive sign here. Either way, the real comedy begins when other women, their bladders spotting an opportunity, try to exit the bus. The driver had to speak quickly, and deal with some disgruntled mamas! Finally, I got up and went towards the toilets, just to let Em know that everyone was getting "pissed-off" (aha!). She returned to the bus quickly. she got some glares, but I don't think she noticed. Tres drole.

Did I mention pineapple on a stick?

Beauteous!

the rest of the trip was not nearly as exciting, we got some reading done, listened to tunes, etc. Phnom Penh was also anti-climactic: no floods! We found our way to our guest-house, once again avoiding having to take a tuk-tuk with their terribly high rates for foreigners.

What are we doing, actually?

It's a question both Emily and I had a few days after we arrived. I mean, we knew in general what we'd be upto, but discovering the specifics is another thing altogether. So, what are the specifics?

So far, Emily facilitated a training for the teachers at the GEMS elementary school, and I started facilitating a training for some of the staff/graduate students of UniED and CORDE. This was great, as we both got a chance to build some closer friendships with our participants, and got a quick taste of what we might be doing while we're here!

Now Emily's training is over, and the staff are cleaning-up and reorganizing their classrooms, and prepping the materials for the upcoming semester (starts oct.3rd). Emily's also signed up to teach an English language class and a half-day kindergarten class! I helped her move some furniture around, and we discussed the role of classroom design and environment and its effect on the focus and learning of the students. We'll soon see if her class is fit to handle the kiddies.

Oh yeah, we also teach people crib, and learn some
fun Asian card-games like "poh-quat"

The training which I am facilitating is continuing, and may extend further into the future than we'd all first thought (as the participants alert me to prior commitments!). I'm trying to reflect as much as I can on how I can better facilitate, what the needs of the participants are, how to overcome the English-language barrier while studying materials that are in English, what are good examples for the concepts we're exploring, etc. I really want to see the participants enabled to fluently use the language and concepts that we're learning about - which is presenting all of us with a challenging class. I got a few complaints about the difficulty, but also a lot of comments about how much some of the participants are enjoying learning. I'm enjoying learning with them as well, so so far I'm feeling like we're on the right path. Heppy times!

We're still in the process of looking for a more permanent living space. We've seen some ridiculous places so far - places with rooms so small that I had to bend down to get into them. It felt slightly Lord of the Rings-ish. We have a few more leads to follow up on, and are hoping we can find a clean place without excessive mosquitoes. It's not a long list, but it's a bit hard to fill so far. hah.

So that's a brief overview for now. The description of what we do could change tomorrow. We'll likely expand the breadth and depth of our actions as we get to know the community and our institutions better - and see how we can apply and develop ourselves while we serve and develop our new community!

the new do

it is too hot for beautiful curls

so i cut

but the rockstar look is still too messy for a teacher

so i clean it up

i am told to keep cutting

we pause: he in joy, i in sorrow

now he is serious professional

now he seriously sips espresso

my hair is too hot too...

Settling in

This is the broom we used to sweep cobwebs off the ceiling.

I've been introducing Em to the few ins-and-outs of Battambang that I know, and re-acquainting myself in the process.It doesn't feel like home yet, but I feel like we're steadily settling in: cleaning things, doing laundry, fixing-up little bits and pieces around the apartment, learning how to best secure a mosquito net, and cooking meals (we have a deal with the three other residents of the building - each of us takes a day of the week to cook dinner, so we get to eat every night, but don't have to cook every night).

Cleaning here's a bit different of course - the slightest trace of food brings ants (which I have to to sweep off our bed a few times now, bigger traces of food bring rats (which ate one of our bananas); plaster regularly crumbles off of sections of the wall (makes me think of dandruff, which then makes me want to give the poor wall/ceiling some kind of shampoo to help it along); Spider webs are invisible for a week or two, and then collect all the dust in the air and turn brown (leaving us with large brown strings everywhere on the ceiling); clothes only dry in the morning, before the rain, and on and on. We're re-learning bit by bit how to maintain a good standard of cleanliness, and what things just can't be cleaned (poor crumbly wall/ceiling).

What's better than fried bananas?
Friend bananas in maple syrup.

Who's sweating more, eggplants or emdawgs?

Em prepping the potatoes.

We've also learnt(/I'm starting to recall) some of the finer points of shopping in a wet-market. We got DESTROYED by this one lady who sold us potatoes that all looked good, but two giant ones were completely rotten on the inside. They were so expensive. We've pretty much decided not to shop with that lady anymore. Still, a  good lesson in attending in great detail to the produce we buy. There's no quality control here - just people bringing goods form their homes/farms to sell everyday. We managed to get almost everything we need for our two dinners (we have thursday and friday nights).

These guys play every afternoon kiddie-corner to us.
I may have to get back into SEA chess.

While walking around, we saw a large group of people huddled over a table. There was great shouting, and the waving of arms, and excited jumping and such. Of course, we had to investigate. Turns out this young guy was testing his mettle against the resident champ in a game of chess! It's south-east asian style, and I learnt the rules last time I was here, but I couldn't recall exactly what all the pieces did. I love how everyone gets excited about chess out here. It's like the Khmer equivalent of a break-dance battle. So sweet.

Em and I have been making a few new friends around our area of town as well. Many Cambodians run a small business at or from their homes. This means that there's a general store every few meters. We've befriended one of these intrepid businesswomen who lives in an alley beside our building. We've taken to walking through the alley because it's surprisingly clean! It looks as if everyone in that alley had banded together to create at least one space that is well-kept and tidy in the middle of the ghetto.

We also still find time to frequent a cafe or two.

Gecko Cafe continues to deliver

Much love,

Ash

Mendicancy and Prejudice

I have a difficult time dealing with the question of mendicancy.

It came up yesterday when Emily and I were sitting in a little khmer cafe. We were seated near the door, facing the outdoors, sipping on khmer iced-coffees, and reading philosophy. How bourgeois. An older one-legged man hopped past the restaurant with a crutch, until he was almost out of sight. At the last minute, he looked over his shoulder, and (we thought) saw us seated near the exit.

[Now, it often happens that foreigners, especially white foreigners in Cambodia, are approached (if not assaulted) by mendicants. By mendicants I mean professional beggars. Those who are dedicating their lives to asking for money from others. Those who, if you remain in a place long enough, will see day-in and day-out sitting on a corner and begging for their livelihood.]

I assumed that this one-legged man was one of the same group. Especially since he turned back and approached us after looking over his shoulder. Immediately after making eye-contact I told him "ot-te" which basically means "no". He seemed to ignore me, and kept approaching. So I said it again (it being the crude, but only way I know of saying "no" to beggars). After saying no a second time, I noticed that he wasn't stepping into the restaurant, and that he actually had money in his hand, and was looking in to the cafe.

You see, the cafe has a small stall outside that sells local food, and it had just recently been stocked by the employees. They were sitting in the back and having lunch themselves, so they didn't see this little scene playing out at the front of the cafe.

So here I am. the dreadful realization of an alternate explanation for the man's actions dawning in my mind. "Maybe he just wanted to buy a meal". All of this happened in a second, just after I said no a second time. Before I could say another word, the man shot me a hurtful glance and hopped away. I felt terrible. I wanted to say so many things to the man. I wanted to apologize; I wanted to alert the staff that they have a customer waiting; I wanted to buy his meal for him; I wanted to do anything I could to atone for my insult. Too late. He had left. And with his departure, left me embarrassed and shamed.

Emily said that she was sure he only turned back after making eye-contact with her, and that it wasn't the food that caught his eye. She also said that he had the money in his hand the whole time. What a strange and ambiguous situation then, where two equally possible stories describe the same situation. Emily suggested I take the situation as a reminder of what kinds of perceptions we're putting on people that we meet; that we should be wary of what prejudices we might have floating around inside us.

It's not that she mentioned the word prejudice (I threw that in - artistic license), but I knew that's what her comment was getting at. I have considered before the prejudices that people have of the poor, but I have never really considered (or even seen) those prejudices in myself. I consider, like many Baha'is, the elimination of prejudice of all kinds as a requisite to spiritual growth. At the same time, we've been reading some of Martin Buber's works. He talks about some random stuff, and is often abstruse, and excessively wordy. In spite of that, we've gleaned some great stuff from his philosophy. He talks about the necessity of meeting each situation for what it is, and responding to it specifically. This experience brought to my attention how much of my life must actually be on autopilot; how little consideration I'm actually giving to the nuances of each situation I encounter. Essentially, I wanted to share this little realization I've had of the importance of giving each situation a careful consideration; of approaching each person with respect. Indeed, it looks right now like a very good method for me to eliminate my prejudices.

I'm not sure how they will look different, or what they will look like, but I am sure my interactions with everyone I meet will be perceptibly different from here on in [I'll be sure to write it up when I figure it out!].

Much love,

Ashraf.


p.s. Please comment if you have some experiences/advice/thoughts about mendicancy, or the elimination of prejudice!

Battambang

The view from our room in Gems

at war with mosquitoes

In Battambang we fight battles. We fight against jet lag by not napping during the day and forcing ourselves to stay up longer than the sun, which sets at 6:00pm.We fight against the heat with thoughtfully placed fans and open windows. We fight against the mosquitoes by climbing up flimsy ladders to fix window screens and by sleeping under a net. I think we have finally reached an upper hand on all three, but I still have constellations of itching red welts as a reminder of the battles being fought.

the river before it was TOO high

enjoying sugar cane juice and
viewing the river at its current peak

The town itself is also fighting. This is a seemingly lost battle against water. The river that runs through Battambang is high and fast. One friend told us that it hasn't been this high in ten years, and people stand along the banks and bridges just watching it in awe. Certain streets are also flooding. Yesterday it was just big puddles, one of which offered up a soaking hundred dollar bill, that have today grown into intersection lakes.

devotional 

Between all battles we also have some time for a pretty sweet life. I have been doing some teacher training using the Hidden Gems Curriculum with the teachers at the Hidden Gems International School in Battambang (which we are currently living above), Ash has started putting together a masters course for UniED students. We have a dinner schedule with our housemates so everyone only has to cook once a week which is a great way to not have to worry about cooking, and get to try new foods (primarily Malaysian and Chinese). On Sunday morning Aunty Grace made all of us nasi lemak (but she spared us the anchovy garnish...) it was delicious. Later on Sunday a group of first year UniED students came over for a devotional. It turns out that "God is Sufficient" has the same tune in many languages, so the boys taught it to us in Khmer (Cambodian), then we taught it to them in English and then "Kim", our Chinese roommate, taught everyone the prayer in Chinese. We decided to save Arabic for next week.

In sum the first few days here have been pretty awesome. Between down-pours we have walked around a few different parts of the city and I am beginning to feel more like I know the place everyday.

in Khmer Cafe to escape the rain

A More Chronological Capturing of Events in the Form of a Poem:

first day in battambang
nassi lemak breakfast
gecko cafe nachos, coffee
walked around in battambang (stuck in rain, khmer cafe)
devotional with unied students
learned God is Sufficient in Khmer and Chinese,
save Arabic for next time
taught God is Sufficient in English

breakfast at sunrise cafe

dinner by Grace
chinese moon festival

second night in battambang
slept by 7:00pm
got bitten by mosquitos
woke up by 1:55am
Ashraf woke up by 2:30am
slept until 5:30am

second day in battambang

the money was counterfeit

breakfast at sunrise cafe
gems teacher meeting
ash to unied
skype with mom and dad
lunch at one more smoking pot
found money
market for fruit, veg, eggs, yogurt
unied (becoming insted)
walk through nice part of town
high river

48-ish Hours In

September 8th, 10:15 A.M. Pacific Time,  Vancouver International Airport

Talking to the P-units

We arrive at the airport expecting to check in at 11 for our flight which we thought left at 2:00 P.M. We discover three things: 1) The flight leaves at 2:40 P.M., so we're VERY early (first time in my life, marriage is crezy) 2) The Korean Air desk doesn't open for another 45 mins, so we're stuck with our bags for a while, and 3) Our bags are overweight! Luckily, these three work together to give us enough time to re-pack our bags using the airlines scales. We juggle our books, clothes, and laptops so that all four checked bags are the maximum allowable weight, and we only have a small excess to throw into our carry-ons.

The check in takes a while, since we booked our tickets separately (we couldn't figure out why we did that), and Emily had her name as "Emily MacDonald" on the ticket, which doesn't match her shiny new "Emily Rushdy" passport. We had to present our marriage certificate, but we got through just fine.

Em killing time

September 8th, 11:10 A.M. Pacific Time, Vancouver International Airport.

We have 3.5 hours to kill.

So we bought some classic Canadian maple syrup and maple-caramel candies to give as presents to people in Cambodia, went through security, found some wifi, and called our parents to say bye.

September 8th, 2:10 P.M. Pacific Time, Vancouver International Airport

Takeoff! We read a bit of Martin Buber's "Between Man and Man", watched Thor, and ate Bee Bim Bap. Asome. Then we discovered best part of the Korean Air in-flight entertainment package: in-flight TETRIS. This was plus drole, and we played several times. You can play anyone else on the plane, but we seemed to be the only two interested in head-to-head tetris. It took us a while to figure out: when you clear more than two lines, your opponent receives those lines unless they clear their own lines, and vice-versa. This made tetris pretty intense. I'm not bad at tetris, but I discovered that Emily is insane! I think the quickest game we played saw her kill me in 10 lines. Ridiculous. In my defense, I won a few, and we both got better as we played more, but she always held the upper-hand.

Bee Bim Bap!

September ??, ?? P.M., Korean Airplane.

She isn't actually that excited about the seaweed soup

We've been chasing the sun the whole flight,and the cabin lights have been dim for a few hours. Everyone's either sleeping, watching a movie, or trying to sleep. Emily finally manages to fall asleep in the awkward economy-class seats, when the lights pop on, and the flight-attendant wakes us all up! I thought that we would be arriving soon, but we soon discover that they're serving a meal.



Emily has to move her seat back upright because the table-trays don't unfold well unless the seats are upright. We were sure that we'd be served breakfast, but no, it's dinner #2. we could only really handle the dessert with some tea...though, I did my best with the meal as well :)

September 9th, 5:30 P.M., Korean Time, Seoul International Airport.

As we disembark Emily discovers that she has a cramp in her arm from all the tetris playing - apparently I wasn't mashing the buttons as intensely. We worried about our 50 minute transfer, but it turns out that our departure gate was immediately past transfer security, which gave Em enough time to discover the secret world of Korean singing toilets.

September 9th, 10:30 P.M., Cambodia Time, Phnom Penh International Airport.

Collecting bags in Phnom Penh

We get off in a mess of people running to sign up for Visas. We threw our passports into the mix, and an airport worker who looks (and acts) like he'd been drinking, manages to pass our documents down the assembly line of visa-makers. We head down to the other end, where another airport-worker calls out people's names to come and pay for their visa. He calls for Ashrasss, I get my Passport, we go on. the next bit is interesting - they took photos and fingerprinted us (with fancy machines) just before we could get our luggage.


September 9th, a bit later P.M., Cambodia Time, just outside PPIA.

 We find Prema waiting to meet us! We were so lucky to have Prema in town, and able to ease us into Cambodian life. After some fine maneuvering to fit all our bags in a taxi, we made our way to the Bur Ly guesthouse, where we crashed for the night.

4:00 A.M., Cambodian Time, Bur Ly room 507.

Em and I both wake up ready for the day. Realizing the time (after re-setting my iPhone), we decided to go back to sleep.

7:00 A.M., Cambodian Time, Bur Ly room 507.

Chilling with some new friends and old friends

We get up, slip a note under Prema's door to knock when she's up, and get ready for the day. We joined Prema for breakfast, met up with a friend named Naseem (and her almost-2-yr-old twins), and together with Naseem's driver, we headed out to meet some Cambodian friends!

We spent some time chatting, and got to know everyone and their babies. After we spent a bit of time entertaining the kids, Emily and I were quizzed about when we're having some of our own. These kinds of questions are happening too quickly, seriously, we've been married for a few months - why not ask "How is married life?", or "how are you two getting along?", or, "what are your plans for the next little while?". Of course, they were mostly in jest, and all the parents re-iterated how much fun the non-kids time together is. So, if you're wondering, "not just yet". :P

Prema and I at the Dosa Corner

After a brief siesta back at the BL, Emily and Prema and I went to one of my favorite restaurants in Phnom Penh, "The Dosa Corner". I love dosas. A Dosa is like a rice-flour crepe with variable filling, usually a spicy potato and veggie thing. Em tried one, I had two that were super-spicy (I could count the green chillis in it!) and Prema had one as well.

Em's new cell; She's pumped.

Later, Prema took us to a place called "Lucky Groceries", where we bought a few supplies, and then later to a small cell-phone dealer to hook Emily up with a brand new celly.


After all of that, Prema went to the trouble of negotiating a taxi-ride for us right to GEMS (where we're staying) in Battambang from the BL!

The taxi was a bit late, but that was fine with us, as we had time to have another mini-siesta, and say some prayers. The taxi ride up was quick (since I napped a bit more!) and full of interesting sights, which neither Em, nor I, were on the ball about photographing. We saw motorcycles hooked up to giant trailers, pulling 30-40 factory workers home from their shifts; lots of people "fising" the "fis" from the "fis fahm". Our driver was a wonderful guy named "Own". Apparently, he "Own's" the road, as he drove in the middle of the highway a lot when there were no other cars oncoming...it was a bit strange, but turned out to be for good reason - there were small animals all over the sides of the road at night.

We got in safe and sound at around 8:00 P.M. to a home-cooked malaysian meal! Aunty Grace (Prema's mom) received us, and helped us settle in to our new (but temporary) digs.

Note: Emily's also an author on the blog, so she'll post some articles up now and then as well.

Love from the Kingdom (of Cambodia),

Ashraf